So but stuff fascinates you? Don’t worry; there are plenty of people who share identical keenness. You might have had plenty of experience in anal sex in the past, or this is the first time anal sex is intriguing you. Everyone can make use of a few tips now and then. Knowing more about anal sex will only make it safer and more fun for you.
Going through the back door is a fantasy many men have thought about, and if you haven’t had the chance yet, don’t cross it off your to-do list (pun intended). People have different reactions to the notion of anal sex. Some seem to be aroused just by the thought of it, while others seem to panic.
17 Things to Help You in First Time Anal Sex
Anal sex is way more high-maintenance than many other sexual activities that you can do. You have to take care of a lot of things before you can actually get into the act. So here are the 17 most essential tips and tricks to help you out in your anal adventures:
1. The Right Anal Sex Does Not Hurt
People have very different anecdotes when asked about how anal sex feels. Some say that the feeling resembles being “filled-up”, while others say it feels like a massage that hits all the right places. While you can take notes from all the people who have experienced it, you need to know that anyone who has had it right felt good about it.
How anal sex should feel boils down to countless factors, ranging from the anatomy of the people involved and the amount of lube you guys use. But a painless experience is what anal should be. If it hurts, you are not doing it right.
2. Experiment Solo
This tip is not limited to the one on the receiving end of anal. When you have felt something inside yourself, you know how to make better decisions with your partner. Having a slow exploration session will help the giver to understand what it might be like for the receiver and vice versa.
The next time you take a shower, grab some lube with you or use some shower gel to lubricate your fingers. Start gently massaging your anus for a few minutes, and then slowly insert the tip of your middle finger and explore yourself. As you examine yourself, try contracting and relaxing your sphincter and see how that feels.
Knowing the perspective of your partner can be very helpful to both of you during sex. It will allow you to give them a much better time and enjoy it to the fullest extent yourself too.
3. Don’t Worry About Poo!
If your partner takes care and cleans themselves well (especially before an anal session), you are highly unlikely to find any faecal matter in the rectum. Before you can find any faeces there, you would probably be on your way to your nearest washroom to answer the call of nature. So it isn’t half as dirty as you might think if you never had any experience in anal.
4. Lube is Your Best Friend
Unlike other forms of penetrative sex, anal does not have any natural lubrication produced by the body. Also, the walls of the anus are much thinner than the vagina. If not properly lubricated, there is a severe risk of injury. So it becomes much more complicated, especially in terms of lube.
You need to look for two things in a lube when you want one for anal. Firstly it should be very viscous. The thicker a lube is, the slippery it will be, and it will reduce any chances of tearing or cuts in the rectum. Secondly, you need a lube that is friendly with condoms and does not evaporate quickly. So look for a silicone-based lube!
5. Talk
Like any new sexual experience you want to have with your partner, you need to discuss the possibility and the things involved in anal beforehand. Talk with your partners about all your fears and expectations from anal, and discuss your speed and depth too. Go into every intricate detail; you don’t want surprises in anal!
Not just before you start having sex, it is probably even more important to talk during it. Tell your partner exactly what you are feeling, and as soon as things get uncomfortable, your partner needs to know. It would be great if you agreed on a safeword before anal. You always need an emergency halt button when you are experimenting with something new!
6. Foreplay is Key
This seems to be the common ground for any tips and tricks article you have ever read related to sex. That’s just because it is essential. The best way to ease into anal and any other sexual activity is to be very aroused before you get to it. You can even have vaginal sex before you get to anal.
Your sphincter will be more relaxed the more aroused you are. So make use of that fact and get the heat on!
7. Start Slow
Never go full speed from the very first moment. If you have gotten as far as anal, you must know that fact well enough by now. Start by lubricating your or your partner’s anus and gently massaging it with your fingers. Press on it gently for a while before inserting a finger.
Once they are comfortable enough with one finger, you can go to two fingers or even a butt plug. Then finally, if you feel your partner is ready for it, enter them with a penis or your strap. There is no exact time anyone can tell you before your partner is willing. Everyone has different levels of tolerance and arousal. Some might need a few minutes, while others may never even get there!
So start slow and gradually build up, making sure that your partner is comfortable with your every move.
8. Positions
Many positions are great for anal penetration. Your partner can be on their back, on all fours or even on their stomach as you penetrate them. Some might prefer being on top as it gives them more control. It all boils down to the preference of your partner and what feels good.
Some positions can be much better for beginners than others. An example of a very comfortable position is spooning. As you get on your partner’s back and penetrate them, let them take control of the pace and motion. They might need some time to get used to having you inside their backdoor.
9. Eat Lightly Before Anal
This one is much more important for the receiving partner. Before you plan to have anal sex, avoid any fatty foods and eat lightly. When you eat fatty foods, your faeces become softer. You have a much greater chance of having leftover poop in your rectum even though you cleaned it after a bathroom visit.
10. Use a Condom
Unlike many men who love to think, a condom is not just there to prevent unexpected pregnancies. If there is no chance of getting pregnant through anal, it is not an invitation to forget about the condom. A condom is very important in preventing STIs. The anal hole is not as clean as the vagina, so it’s best if you forget having anal without a condom.
11. Never Switch From Anal to Vaginal Sex!
An extension of the point above, as the anus is factually not as clean as the vagina, it has some bacteria that should not make their way into the vagina at any cost. Porn can be misleading in this matter as you see things being shoved in multiple holes without any care at all. But that is one of the many things that porn has done wrong.
If you shift from anal to vaginal penetration during sex, you are bound to cause your partner a bacterial infection. Make it a rule, wash anything that has entered the anus before it goes into the vagina.
12. Vaginal Stimulation
Yes, we just told you not to insert your penis or strap on in the vagina just after being in the anus. But that doesn’t mean that there is no need to stimulate the vagina! Many nerve endings are common to the vagina and the anus. It can be very pleasurable to stimulate the vagina by inserting a finger or a vibrator as you penetrate your partner anally!
13. Don’t Rush Out
Movement when you enter the anus, is not as intense as when you are exiting it. Be sure to pull out as slowly and gently as possible when you are leaving the butthole. Even if your partner screams at you to get out, get out patiently, a quick motion will cause them even more pain, and you do not want to do that.
14. Be Ready To Improvise
While thinking about bad things during anal can stress you out and increase their possibility, you should know you are not immune to them. Things can go very wrong very quickly when you experiment with new stuff in the bed. So lay down a few sheets and keep some wet wipes handy.
Not only will you act better in case of an emergency, but it will also put your partner at ease to think that you have a contingency plan in place. Just by doing all this, you are reducing the chances of things going south.
15. Keep Breathing Steady
As painfully obvious, some women feel so much pressure the first time they have anal that they forget to breathe. They are holding breath during anal leads to the tightening of the rectum almost immediately. That can result in excruciating pain. So keep your breaths steady and focus on keeping your body tension-free.
Things will go much smoother if you are comfortable both mentally and physically.
16. Don’t Stress Over It
You can choose to engage in or not to engage in anal any time you feel like it. And your partner should understand the pressure you might be in. if you are looking for the right time to try anal, there might never be one. The right time is only when you want to do it. For some women, it is never a possibility, and that is fine!
17. Aftercare
This is the most critical step of all. Anal can be a very intense experience. Not just for someone receiving it for the first time, even the giver faces a lot of stress. The slightest carelessness can quickly put you in an awful situation, and that stress can be nerve-wracking. So plenty of kisses and cuddles after a first-time anal experience is a must!
Know the Risks Involved
Anal is probably the most high-stakes sexual activity you can do in the bedroom. It is not very fun to hear, but it is not wise to get into something without knowing the risks. Anal sex has a much higher risk of people contracting severe sexually transmitted diseases, even HIV!
Research shows that HIV is 15 times more likely to be transferred through penis-anal sex than penis-vaginal. And even for people who have negative results for HIV and other STIs, it is not safe. Indulgence in anal sex also increases the chances of anal cancer in the participants.
Is Anal Worth It?
If you are ready to take these risks, anal has a lot of sexual satisfaction and pleasure. Anal is undoubtedly more than a kink. It is one of the most pleasurable and intense sexual experiences that most couples lust for. You cannot eliminate it from your list of sexual activities without considering it.
It would be best to have an earnest discussion with your partner to see where you both stand about this if you both decide it’s best not to get into anal; all the power to you! But if you choose to give it a try, there are plenty of precautions that you can take to keep it safe and sexy; you can find almost all of them above!