Taking control in the bedroom can be an empowering experience, especially if you are shifting from being submissive. The best way to take power over your partner is a dominating sex position. Or, if you usually dominate your partner, then changing things up and giving them control over you can be an enlightening new experience.
Both the scenarios, your partner, taking complete control over you or submitting completely to your desires, are sexy in their own way. When you submit yourself, the choice and the stress of decision-making are taken for you, which can be thrilling and relieving simultaneously! The power dynamic of dom/sub situations is truly fascinating!
If you are very used to the traditional dynamics of sex, then this can be new and exciting for both you and your partner. So stay dialed in and check out unique positions that give and take control from you!
12 Dominating Sex Positions for Couples
There are many misconceptions about sex. One of them is that the one penetrating will dominate how things play out in the bedroom. While most women like it that way, there can be times when the woman wants control. As you will find out below: there are a lot of female-dominant sex positions amongst male ones:
1. The Spreader
Let’s start with one of the racy ones! The woman gets on her back and raises her legs, just like in missionary. Their partner will get on their heels and grab them by the ankles, and spread their legs as they start penetrating with their penis or strap-on.
This position feels vulnerable as you are on your back, and your partner can enjoy the view. It can be very intimidating being watched like that as your partner ravishes you. Not to mention, it is extremely hot, as your partner gets a good view of all your sexy spots.
2. Missionary
Missionary is one of the first sex positions that couples try. But if it wasn’t so overused, the position itself is very sexy when you think about it. The woman is on her back while her partner covers her. The feeling of your body touching your partners is another level of intimacy.
Why is it such an excellent dominating position? That is because it allows you a lot of leverage to make it a dominating one. Your partner can get right up in your face and talk dirty, or they can bite your lips, ears, or even nipples to assert dominance.
If you both are okay with choking, there is nothing that is stopping you! Just make sure you don’t put pressure on the front of the throat.
3. Classic Cowgirl
This is one of the oldest positions in the book! But it is a perfect one to give control to the one being penetrated. The one on top has a sense of power over the other and control over the rhythm and depth of penetration.
How to get into the position? It is pretty simple. As one partner lies down on the bed (or on the floor if you want), the other gets on top with their legs spread. The one on top can lower their body as much as they want.
Once the penis is as deep as you want, you control the movement; up and down, back and forth, or rotating their pelvis in tight circles. The only limit to the possibilities is your imagination!
4. Doggy Style
This is one of the most popular positions out there, and it is undoubtedly dominating. Just by being on all fours, you get a feeling of inferiority. While you are on all fours on the couch or the bed, your partner penetrates you from the back. Your partner can take complete control of you.
The fact that you don’t even face your partner in this position makes it feel all the more impersonal. It feels like you are submitting to the primal instincts of your partner. You can add things like pillows to lift your rear better, giving your partner better access. It is dominating because it can almost feel like your partner is using you as an object.
5. Koala Bear Missionary
You thought that you couldn’t be in control if you were on your back? Well, it’s possible, and here is how. Just get into the traditional missionary position and hold your partner using your legs wrapped around their back. Pull them closer to be deep inside you, and once they are there, squeeze your pelvic muscles to grip them tightly inside you.
You are free to bite them, pull their hair, or scratch their back once they are near you. Your partner isn’t going anywhere.
6. Lowered Dog
This is a variation of your typical doggy style. Instead of being on all fours, you let yourself even lower down from the front. You can do that by being on your elbows or placing a cushion beneath your head and resting your upper weight on it. With this, you get all the goodies of doggy style, but you are face down and ass up.
Your partner can make use of this position by dominating you into staying down. They can push the back of your head in the pillow, or they can pull your hands behind you. You are not getting any control over your partner in this position!
7. Headboard Hardball
This is an incredibly empowering position for the female partner. You get your male partner (or the one with the strap on if that’s your deal) to place their head against the bed’s headboard using a pillow. Now you get on top of your partner, grip the bed’s headboard, or get support from the wall behind.
You can now grind, rub or bob your way to orgasm as you have trapped your partner beneath you. While you are at it, order them to play with your breasts or your clit.
8. The V
This one, too, starts in the missionary position. Your partner will sit back on their heels as you lift your legs and place them by the heels on your partner’s shoulders. If you feel like making it rougher, cross your legs, their penis or strap-on will have even more friction inside you!
Once you are in that position, your partner leans forward and rests their weight on their hands. Your knees will come closer to your chest because of the weight of your partner. And then your partner can enter you.
This position leaves you pinned down with your back bent, entirely at your partner’s mercy. Your partner can hold your hands above your head, dominating you even more.
9. Down Doggy
Do you want female domination in doggy style? Guess what that is possible too! What you do is that you get to the edge of the bed and keel forward on it. You get your partner behind you and order them not to move at all. With you standing on the ground, you are in the perfect position to take control of the rhythm and angle.
What’s great about this position is that if you angle yourself right, you can stimulate your G-spot each time you thrust yourself back into your partner’s crotch.
10. Handcuffs
Don’t worry; you will not use handcuffs here, at least if you don’t want to. What you have to do is find a waist-high surface. Your partner bends you forward onto it and holds your hands on the back using one hand as if they are about to handcuff you. Your partner has you pinned between their body and the table or counter as they begin to enter you.
You feel like you are in trouble, entirely at the mercy of the law that is your partner. This position is excellent for anal sex or if your partner wants to spank you or pull your hair. Being handcuffed or tied using a rope or a scarf can add to the feeling of being dominated.
11. Face-Sitting
It doesn’t get any simpler or any more dominating than this! Your partner lies with their face up, and you sit on it. You straddle them so they can pleasure you with all they have got. You don’t have to exert any energy at all. Grip their hair and control their pace and what they do at a whim.
You can show your eagerness and gratitude by grinding your vagina on their mouth to show them they are doing a great job!
12. Doggy Blowjob
Doggy-style never gets old, and neither do its variations. Doggy style is not about vaginal or anal penetration. You can expand it into the realm of oral sex too. You have to get your partner to kneel in front of you. Now you get on your hands and knees facing them.
You get the same subservient feeling from being on your hands and knees. At the same time, your partner controls the pace! Your partner can hold the back of your head and use it to, essentially, have intercourse with your mouth. This can be so dominating that you only get to breathe when they allow you to!
Decide a Safeword and Get Consent First
If you are a beginner to this whole dominant/submissive dynamic, you need to know what you are getting into. It adds to the excitement of sex, but it is way more complicated, especially psychologically. Normal sex dynamics are normal because they are safer and less wild.
The first thing you need to know when diving into this is a safe word. A safeword is a kill button to anything you are doing. The act may be too intense for your partner, or they might be hurt. Hence the safe word is there to tell you to stop.
Sometimes in sub/dom intercourse, telling someone to stop is part of the act. There can be role-play and a lot of other things that you are pretending to be. A safeword is something you don’t normally say or usually. So when your partner hears it, they know that something is wrong.
Secondly, you need the full consent of your partner, especially if you are the one dominating. Domination can sometimes get rough, and maybe your partner does not know what they are getting into. If someone is to hand over all control to you, they should do it willingly.
Let Your Wildest Fantasies Come to Life
Lack of communication is the worst enemy of a happy relationship, especially for the sexual part. The kinks and fetishes of a person play a huge role in how excited they are for sex. And if done correctly, being submissive and dominating can be beautiful experiences for a person.
For the submissive, you get a lot of attention from the person dominating you. You probably won’t get half the attention in your everyday life from them. And when you dominate, you get direct control of all the actions, and it is up to you to care for your partner and deal with them however you like!
A power dynamic can be beautiful if played out in the right way. Just make sure to take the proper precautions necessary!